It’s Sunday lunch and the weather has made a spectacular comeback. A perfect winter’s day in Coolangatta. What to do? Coffee and cake and Cafe Dbar please.
My favourite bad habit. Cake and coffee instead of an actual meal. Today I have absolutely discovered the perfect new location in which to indulge.
I use to consider ‘going for a coffee’ as a hobby saved for pretentious metrosexual wankers. After today’s treat, I’ve gone from sitting on the fence to a full convert. Figure as long as I don’t peroxide my hair and pop up a pink collared polo, I can still win respect amongst my bogan friends.
The culprit responsible for my full conversion … Mars Bar Cheesecake! OMFG! I have no idea what else is offered at Cafe Dbar.
I was caught by a sign for a cheap coffee+cake combo. The friendly waitress called this delicacy first from a long rehearsed list. I interrupted and almost screamed “just put it in my face!”
The Cafe layout is cute but I was taking away to sit in the park overlooking some of the most gorgeous coastline in the country. When I joined the rest of my party, I was sad to see that they had waited patiently for me on the grass. Their intention to purchase as a group before settling in the sun with coffee and treats in hand.
Like an asshole, I opened the Mars Bar Cheesecake package and ignored their kind gesture. Presented with sturdy take away cutlery and giant red strawberry as garnish, I’ve never cared so little about being so goddamn rude. The platter just insults anybody who isn’t enjoying their own.
I ate like a gentlemen, keeping the groans to a minimum. Nodding politely as I ignored whoever the hell was talking. I climaxed whilst sucking the last half of the succulent strawberry. Nobody needed to ask. It was written all over my face “fuck yeah!”.
If you live on the Gold Coast and have ignored the opportunity to visit this cosy little establishment… you’re an idiot. Next time the sun is out just go.