Hello, and welcome to ‘Love from Summer Xx’, an old-fashioned advice column where you can open up your heart, and I open up a lively can of solicited advice, sage wisdom, home truths and tough love.
After a very long-term relationship, I find myself single for the first time in an epoch. So whilst the whole dating thing is going better than expected, I am challenged by the whole ”booty call etiquette” as it is a recent development as far as I am concerned so your advice would be greatly appreciated.
As an example, if I was to receive a said booty call and I do not wish to accept how does one gracefully not accept?
Dearest Old Spice,
Thank you for your sincerity. And in the words of Chaka Khan, “I feel for you”. Saying no to a booty call can be very uncomfortable and downright difficult. Declining the pleasures of the flesh is not always easy.
If you do receive an unwelcome late night call or text for nothing more than a casual hook up here’s what you do. Be honest, direct and sincere. Convey in no uncertain terms that you are not that type of guy. That you don’t do booty calls.
If you are looking for a real relationship outside of the bedroom with this randy sex pot, then try this. Tell them if they would like to see you, they can ask you in advance, at a respectable hour and to meet in public. Be sure to keep your tone polite and pleasant, you always catch my flies with honey! If you have made your expectations clear and they make another unsolicited request, simply ignore it. Because they don’t deserve any more of your precious time or energy.
I invite you to send your dating dilemmas and curly questions to firstname.lastname@example.org
Please keep correspondence free from filth and vulgarity. But if at all possible full of flamboyance and above all else truth.
Love from Summer Xx
Boss Lady Matchmaker @ Mate4Life.